Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Cows, milk & little sausages

If you're as frantic as me in the lead up to Christmas, you'll appreciate this for a laugh.
(It was emailed to me by a very smart lady over 50.)

In case you missed it on 60 Minutes, this is what Andy Rooney thinks about women over 50:

As I grow in age, I value women over 50 most of all.
Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 50 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, 'What are you thinking?' She doesn't care what you think.

If a woman over 50 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.

Women over 50 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 50.

Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 50 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest... They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk, if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 50 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 50, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress.

Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, 'Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free? Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage.
Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

Andy Rooney is a really smart guy!

3 comments:

Kerrin said...

ha! love it :)

Lacey Devlin said...

It's great! My favorite line was "... Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hestitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it..."

That will carry me through the day lol!

Romance, Rumours and Rogues said...

lol, my favourite was the 'pig and little sausage' comment, classic!